A weekend of real fire...our God is a consuming fire
"Safe? Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good." ~C.S. Lewis (from the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe)
Have you ever looked around you and really wondered why aren't we thinking more? In this day and age where technology has transformed our livelihood making our lives faster, and more modernized from the early era of when people actually had to work hard for a living, have we become consumed and stop thinking? Or at least thinking less about the more deeper and important things that make up our existence.
So I have a lot of catching up to do. To start off from when I last left off, I was in desperate need of a good sleep. As the past few nights had left me un-energize, unmotivated, and drained. It was like living the beginning of the movie the Matrix where Neo is discovering maybe this world isn't as it seems...follow the white rabbit Neo.
These past few days I haven't been here, since I was plagued by the previous night time events. The dreams of horrible circumstances occurring replayed over in my mind like a bad black and white movie of the olden days. It has pulled any sort of deep sleep that a person needs to fully recover from the days events. So I woke up and walked through that day living my nightmares in a physically awakened body but mentally my mind wandered as it drifted through that incredibly hard day.
The after thoughts brought me to the conclusion that the devil is always at your heel. The times you are ready you defeat him in battle, you end up not noticing how hard he has been aggressively attacking but when a soldier is drifting in another state of mind the attack seems a lot more harder even though it's the same battle. It's the battle position of the soldier that makes the difference. It's this battle position of a soldier that makes them human.
This weekend has made me realize all the events of the past week has been for the purpose of learning more about God. Even though it's been in reality a matter of days, it feels as if a few weeks has dawned upon me and the knowledge I have gained has been benifitual to my well being.
So this whole week I have been trying to fast from noise and trying to listen more on what the whispers of the Holy Spirit has taught me. It was hard since living in a large group rarely gives you the opportunity to dwell on these matters, especially with many socialy active butterflies, but even this being said, God still manages to speak above the noise of the crowd. So on April 1st was the first lesson.
The day started out with an un-startling dream about my dear friend. Because of what happened in the dream, my mind was left in a questionable state. This however lead me to be in prayer about all the past so called nightmares, if you can call them that at this age. I went on throughout the day with it's lingering presents attached to the back of my worried heart. The funny part of the day was that it was a fool's day being April first and being that day at least as far as I know in North America, Aprils Fools day is a day of pranks. This being said, my tour manager decided to prank us.
It's funny how some of your distrust senses are on a wider range these days. So when me and this other team member got the memo to put on our WDT shirts, my mind directly went into "warning, you are being pranked" mode. I told the girl of my suspicions and we decided to play it by ear. The whole time before the joke was revealed, another nagging thought of this is a prank dragged along at the back of my mind.
The end results played out as follows. Yet another member of the team was a part of this prank dragging the whole team in a frenzy saying that we had a last minute show. A well done performance on her part. All of the veteran team members who have been on more tours knows to expect the unexpected and followed through these protocol. Getting us to believe it, made the newbies follow through with the joke. As the prank was in full motion I still figured that it still could be a joke. Checking the tire gage as part of our co-pilots job, I thought well I guess April fool, fooled me as I thought it was a joke and the real joke is on me that it's not a joke.
Anyway point figures it turned out to be a joke and some of us were amused. However when the other part of me thought it was going to be a show, I began praying, knowing that God would some how take us through it since it was already 12:30pm and if we are to be on time we needed to be there at 1:00pm. Case figure that would make some of us worried. Some of the girls started to sing "Blessed be the name of the Lord" and well it reminded me that God was in control and to praise him in all circumstances.
So the weekend started off as the biggest Aprils Fool Day joke I have ever been a part of, and only big because of the amount of people pulled into the joke. The lessons however brought up was about servant hood and faithfulness on my part to God. Rumors and worries were about the following day in effect of the so called show day. Will we stand by our commitment to serve if it meant getting in at 12:00am to leave at 3:00am to be ready for acquire the Fire conference?
Pain in the offering, blessed be the name of the Lord. Yes a 3:00am start time would be hard, but I figured it would really mean pain in the offering and I would have to pray about that one. As the play goes on, God didn't make us arrive at 12:00am the next day but a good 6-7pm that day. However having such fun billets, I ended up staying up till 11:00pm, one hour before the 12:00am shift. Our leave time for acquire the Fire was only at 4:00am so instead of getting up at 2:00am I was up at 3:00am. An hour time difference can do exactly that.
So I ushered that day and it was motivating. Even though the day started out for me kind of day, it ended up as a for Him, sing glory to Him day. The conference was directed at junior and senior high students but even a old gal like me pulled out stuff that challenged me.
It also brought back to mind a servant-hood to God attitude. If there is no real sacrifice in the offering, are we offering all that we can, or are we holding back? What kind of Christian am I if I am just doing what a really good sinner would do? So at the end of the conference, I was moved to want to make a change in my life. It's hard because sometimes it's easier being a really good sinner than a true soldier of God.
As it turned out, we were challenged that night to serve after the long day and to help our brothers and sisters in Christ out or to go home and sleep. My decision was clear, if I am going to offer this day to the Lord, I am going to offer this day. There was real pain in my offering, I wanted to sleep, go home and relax, but more so I wanted to bring all that I had and give it to God. Through this He has taught me a little more about what it meant to give until it hurts. To offer like the widow, a genuine offering. Through that blessings come. That night as we helped the acquire the Fire team tear down, I began to realize how blessed I was to have a team that helps each other out, and really loves on each other. I was blessed to have a less complicated stage and job to deal with and for that matter a lot smaller amount of work. I was blessed to have 10:15pm tear down times, 10:00pm on good days instead of a insane tear down of 12:00am.
Most of all I was bless to know that this ministry is giving a lot out from it's heart and doesn't need all the splash of technology to make a message reach people. It was a heart-filled message. Genuine, right down to the core.
So after all of that, more heart soared high like a eagle, it roared like a lion, it moved in like a tidal wave, and I was on fire through out the night. The spirit had moved me in more ways that I can imagine.
I returned to my bed at 3:30am this morning. Needless to say at 7:00am with a one hour time zone change, so really 6:00am, I was rested. I only rolled out of the bed at 11:00pm and had a real peaceful day; not only in spirit, but in mind as well. I followed that through with an evening church service. It was beautiful and well done. God continue to speak to me through out the service. "Beautiful things in the universe are rugged, dangerous and wild," the pastor for today said.
Beautiful things...Rugged, dangerous and wild? As he continued, God spoke and my heart poured out "Why, what have I tried doing....God, please forgive me"
Holding back from Moses His full awesomeness, He allowed His created to view only his backside. God's full glory would have killed Moses, this the Lord knew. However, God's love for his creation allowed him to see a glimpse of what would one day be given to man kind for all eternity. It wasn't about me this weekend, it was about His fire. His glory to be fulfilled in my heart.
"We are all theologians and our belief dictates who we ought to be...our actions will reflect who are God is. True fear of the Lord adds to life. Fear of the Lord teaches a man wisdom." As the pastor said these words, I being to question myself. All this time of praying to get rid of fear. I once heard a quote about fear: There is nothing to fear but fear itself. Psychologist say that as if it was only a state of mind, but if you look at the creator of the universe, there is something great to fear. Who should you fear? Fear a God who can not be contained, a God who in a moment can take away the next breath you are about to inhale. The same God who we try to put in a box when things of the world seem so big to us, but in reality is nothing to the God who created the world. The same God who made the most beautiful things in the world a reflection of His character, rugged, dangerous, wild, untamed by any. For an universe as vast as ours, we need an untamed God, a uncaught, un-boxed who is not a puzzle but a full blown mystery. "Safe? Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good." ~C.S. Lewis (from the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe)
That's the God I met this weekend, that's the God I want to be on fire for. That's the God I am in love with and that's the God who only deserves my worship.
~End of weekend~
Miss Mae
Have you ever looked around you and really wondered why aren't we thinking more? In this day and age where technology has transformed our livelihood making our lives faster, and more modernized from the early era of when people actually had to work hard for a living, have we become consumed and stop thinking? Or at least thinking less about the more deeper and important things that make up our existence.
So I have a lot of catching up to do. To start off from when I last left off, I was in desperate need of a good sleep. As the past few nights had left me un-energize, unmotivated, and drained. It was like living the beginning of the movie the Matrix where Neo is discovering maybe this world isn't as it seems...follow the white rabbit Neo.
These past few days I haven't been here, since I was plagued by the previous night time events. The dreams of horrible circumstances occurring replayed over in my mind like a bad black and white movie of the olden days. It has pulled any sort of deep sleep that a person needs to fully recover from the days events. So I woke up and walked through that day living my nightmares in a physically awakened body but mentally my mind wandered as it drifted through that incredibly hard day.
The after thoughts brought me to the conclusion that the devil is always at your heel. The times you are ready you defeat him in battle, you end up not noticing how hard he has been aggressively attacking but when a soldier is drifting in another state of mind the attack seems a lot more harder even though it's the same battle. It's the battle position of the soldier that makes the difference. It's this battle position of a soldier that makes them human.
This weekend has made me realize all the events of the past week has been for the purpose of learning more about God. Even though it's been in reality a matter of days, it feels as if a few weeks has dawned upon me and the knowledge I have gained has been benifitual to my well being.
So this whole week I have been trying to fast from noise and trying to listen more on what the whispers of the Holy Spirit has taught me. It was hard since living in a large group rarely gives you the opportunity to dwell on these matters, especially with many socialy active butterflies, but even this being said, God still manages to speak above the noise of the crowd. So on April 1st was the first lesson.
The day started out with an un-startling dream about my dear friend. Because of what happened in the dream, my mind was left in a questionable state. This however lead me to be in prayer about all the past so called nightmares, if you can call them that at this age. I went on throughout the day with it's lingering presents attached to the back of my worried heart. The funny part of the day was that it was a fool's day being April first and being that day at least as far as I know in North America, Aprils Fools day is a day of pranks. This being said, my tour manager decided to prank us.
It's funny how some of your distrust senses are on a wider range these days. So when me and this other team member got the memo to put on our WDT shirts, my mind directly went into "warning, you are being pranked" mode. I told the girl of my suspicions and we decided to play it by ear. The whole time before the joke was revealed, another nagging thought of this is a prank dragged along at the back of my mind.
The end results played out as follows. Yet another member of the team was a part of this prank dragging the whole team in a frenzy saying that we had a last minute show. A well done performance on her part. All of the veteran team members who have been on more tours knows to expect the unexpected and followed through these protocol. Getting us to believe it, made the newbies follow through with the joke. As the prank was in full motion I still figured that it still could be a joke. Checking the tire gage as part of our co-pilots job, I thought well I guess April fool, fooled me as I thought it was a joke and the real joke is on me that it's not a joke.
Anyway point figures it turned out to be a joke and some of us were amused. However when the other part of me thought it was going to be a show, I began praying, knowing that God would some how take us through it since it was already 12:30pm and if we are to be on time we needed to be there at 1:00pm. Case figure that would make some of us worried. Some of the girls started to sing "Blessed be the name of the Lord" and well it reminded me that God was in control and to praise him in all circumstances.
So the weekend started off as the biggest Aprils Fool Day joke I have ever been a part of, and only big because of the amount of people pulled into the joke. The lessons however brought up was about servant hood and faithfulness on my part to God. Rumors and worries were about the following day in effect of the so called show day. Will we stand by our commitment to serve if it meant getting in at 12:00am to leave at 3:00am to be ready for acquire the Fire conference?
Pain in the offering, blessed be the name of the Lord. Yes a 3:00am start time would be hard, but I figured it would really mean pain in the offering and I would have to pray about that one. As the play goes on, God didn't make us arrive at 12:00am the next day but a good 6-7pm that day. However having such fun billets, I ended up staying up till 11:00pm, one hour before the 12:00am shift. Our leave time for acquire the Fire was only at 4:00am so instead of getting up at 2:00am I was up at 3:00am. An hour time difference can do exactly that.
So I ushered that day and it was motivating. Even though the day started out for me kind of day, it ended up as a for Him, sing glory to Him day. The conference was directed at junior and senior high students but even a old gal like me pulled out stuff that challenged me.
It also brought back to mind a servant-hood to God attitude. If there is no real sacrifice in the offering, are we offering all that we can, or are we holding back? What kind of Christian am I if I am just doing what a really good sinner would do? So at the end of the conference, I was moved to want to make a change in my life. It's hard because sometimes it's easier being a really good sinner than a true soldier of God.
As it turned out, we were challenged that night to serve after the long day and to help our brothers and sisters in Christ out or to go home and sleep. My decision was clear, if I am going to offer this day to the Lord, I am going to offer this day. There was real pain in my offering, I wanted to sleep, go home and relax, but more so I wanted to bring all that I had and give it to God. Through this He has taught me a little more about what it meant to give until it hurts. To offer like the widow, a genuine offering. Through that blessings come. That night as we helped the acquire the Fire team tear down, I began to realize how blessed I was to have a team that helps each other out, and really loves on each other. I was blessed to have a less complicated stage and job to deal with and for that matter a lot smaller amount of work. I was blessed to have 10:15pm tear down times, 10:00pm on good days instead of a insane tear down of 12:00am.
Most of all I was bless to know that this ministry is giving a lot out from it's heart and doesn't need all the splash of technology to make a message reach people. It was a heart-filled message. Genuine, right down to the core.
So after all of that, more heart soared high like a eagle, it roared like a lion, it moved in like a tidal wave, and I was on fire through out the night. The spirit had moved me in more ways that I can imagine.
I returned to my bed at 3:30am this morning. Needless to say at 7:00am with a one hour time zone change, so really 6:00am, I was rested. I only rolled out of the bed at 11:00pm and had a real peaceful day; not only in spirit, but in mind as well. I followed that through with an evening church service. It was beautiful and well done. God continue to speak to me through out the service. "Beautiful things in the universe are rugged, dangerous and wild," the pastor for today said.
Beautiful things...Rugged, dangerous and wild? As he continued, God spoke and my heart poured out "Why, what have I tried doing....God, please forgive me"
Holding back from Moses His full awesomeness, He allowed His created to view only his backside. God's full glory would have killed Moses, this the Lord knew. However, God's love for his creation allowed him to see a glimpse of what would one day be given to man kind for all eternity. It wasn't about me this weekend, it was about His fire. His glory to be fulfilled in my heart.
"We are all theologians and our belief dictates who we ought to be...our actions will reflect who are God is. True fear of the Lord adds to life. Fear of the Lord teaches a man wisdom." As the pastor said these words, I being to question myself. All this time of praying to get rid of fear. I once heard a quote about fear: There is nothing to fear but fear itself. Psychologist say that as if it was only a state of mind, but if you look at the creator of the universe, there is something great to fear. Who should you fear? Fear a God who can not be contained, a God who in a moment can take away the next breath you are about to inhale. The same God who we try to put in a box when things of the world seem so big to us, but in reality is nothing to the God who created the world. The same God who made the most beautiful things in the world a reflection of His character, rugged, dangerous, wild, untamed by any. For an universe as vast as ours, we need an untamed God, a uncaught, un-boxed who is not a puzzle but a full blown mystery. "Safe? Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good." ~C.S. Lewis (from the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe)
That's the God I met this weekend, that's the God I want to be on fire for. That's the God I am in love with and that's the God who only deserves my worship.
~End of weekend~
Miss Mae
posted by Miss Mae | 11:38 PM
1 Comments:
Sometimes I find that the lack of simple labour in our day prevents us from having those deep thoughts. Being caged to a desk or overwealmed with technology creates in us a lethargy. Then we stop thinking and we are just doing.
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