It's Been Two weeks

Tomorrow, actually, will be the two week mark when I had my heart broken. I've been crying a lot. Grieving has been a big part of this journey. I know it hurts those around me to see me in such a state, and it doesn't do me any good to be so down right depress. I sleep a lot, but if it wasn't for school last week, I would have slept the week away. On Friday, I tried to pull myself together. What is worst is that I keep seeing pictures of him being happy and about from picture albums from his friends who are still on my facebook. It hurts me to see he's moved on so suddenly because it makes me wonder if he really did care. The lines are often blurred when you are dealing with someone very unpredictable.

But I move on...

You have to, if you want to have any sort of life. You get up and try to live your life with all the hope and strength you have to muster. It's hard. So Friday, I did just that. I spent Friday, all day pulling myself together. I spent Friday making the red puffy eyes into elegant beautiful ones that were ready to face the world. I took a shower. Not that I haven't been showering, but I took a nice long one and really exfoliated the skin on my legs, belly, arms etc. Then I put on the beautiful dress, the one that I had bought for New Year's Eve, the one that I was going to surprise my now ex-boyfriend with.

I was suppose to go to my friend's Adam's party, but I waited for my best friend to get done his supper with his friends to come and join me. It was good because I really didn't want to be alone. I needed my close friends to lift me up. So I went to Adam's party with my best friend, except we didn't stay long because I was so hurt when everyone kept on asking me if I was okay. I couldn't compose myself and ended up crying and so I knew I had to leave. So my friend, God bless him, took me to the clubs and we ended up having a amazing time. The Dj that I spoke to on the radio ended up sharing a shot with me. And life was happy for that moment. I got some pictures and I wish I could say that one night eliminated the pain of a broken heart, but it didn't. Broken hearts take a long time to heal. Especially ones that have no explainations as to why they became broken in the first place. But as the story goes, pain today, gain tomorrow. Lessons learned about giving your heart away so easily.

I did heal a bit with the fact that I looked fab, and wonderfully amazing that night and well I've been getting compliments from a lot of people on how great I look. This too is part of the healing process, because when you get rejected sometimes your self-esteem takes a beating. So for now, week two, heading into week three, the healing is happening, slowly, but amazingly wonderful.

Peace out.
Miss Mae