Introvert by Nature...The product of what I became

It seems that ever since I have left tour, miss Mae has changed into the most introverted person I know. I guess my very escape is what you see on these pages where I can say what I need to say without worry. Shyness or just afraid of having the world condemn me for me what ever has caused this change.

What seems like an ever growing cycle in my life of extremes is finally wearing out on me...Or is it just trying to find it's balance between extremities?

To those who knew me far before my first tour, this is after I was saved, remember a very hyper happy girl. I am still happy but part of me has become distant. It's a weird change and it worries my friends. They wonder what's up with me, since I am not the same person I was before. Some of them thought I was sad or I wasn't enjoying my time spent with them because I wasn't speaking my mind, or talking up a storm. They were confused by my quietness, and withdrawn introvert persona I displayed.

I still talk up a storm, but not to people, just to my journal. I don't know what is the cause of this. Maybe Miss Mae has finally run out of things to say or maybe it's the company. I feel astranged with the people I knew. They are still the same but some how I am not. This line is from the song 36 days by Hawk Nelson...it's how I feel.

I feel so alive, though a part of me is gone. And this life I lead, is the life I've dreamed of since I was the age of twelve.

I guess I just have become withdrawn from the world or maybe just prefer the comfort of a good book/movie at home rather than people that I am unfamiliar with these days. It's like I can't communicate to anyone these days. My old friends are still there, but I am not the same person I use to be. I wonder if anyone else feels the same way.....